I’m generally a switch (what you do to me, I like to do to you too), but there is a peace and contentment in submitting yourself totally and voluntarily to others.
In “real” life, I avoid confrontation at all costs and hate to upset people, but this is not the same.
Firstly, though, I am not a sissy and never will be: Alice is powerful and confident, but sometimes she likes to give herself totally to the pleasure of others.
Sometimes the submission can be short-lived and sometimes it may last longer. Sometimes, it is done with a glint in the eye and sometimes it is done with the eyes lowered.
Total submission is about giving up your freewill and choices and allowing someone else to make all the decisions and take all the responsibility. This is very freeing and allows you to do things you may not have tried before with no fear or embarrassment as there is “no choice”.
Allow me to provide examples:
In 2017, I met a guy who wanted to tie me up and dominate me. However, his desire for me and my ability to choose whether to let him or not creates its own dynamic. He wanted me to submit to him for sure, but I was the one with the power to please or deny him.
Admittedly once he had me tied up on his bed, he was the one in control and I was powerless: but I was the one who had let him. He had all the pressure and responsibility, while my mind was free to absorb and enjoy the experience.
Whilst at Sweet Wednesday in 2016, I met a guy and gave him a quick blow job (see https://amancalledalice.wordpress.com/2020/03/19/going-underground/). Initially, this was at my instigation. An hour or so later he came and found me again, wanting to finish the job, and led me away by the hand, obviously in control. But, it was he who had to come to find me…
As I knelt before him, I was obviously submissive, but again, control of the situation was definitely in my hands (and mouth).
I met a girl who tied me up with bondage tape, commanded me to do various things. When I failed, I was punished by her ignoring me for 10 minutes or so
Now this was an entirely different scenario to the first two: I was most definitely not in control of this situation, and while my mind went blank and into an almost meditative state, I cannot say that in the end I particularly enjoyed it.
And now to my current state: locked in chastity by @sexyemilyoliver. Undoubtedly I am being submissive and allowing certain elements of my activities to be dictated by someone else.
But again, this is my choice and any submission is completely at my discretion. I enjoy the tease and deny elements and the setting of challenges. I am free of personal responsibility as it was someone else’s instructions I am obeying
And whilst I am physically capable of undoing the lock at anytime, I do not: why is that? Because I enjoy the dynamic of being under the control of someone else. True, at times, it can become fraught and my mind is in all sorts of places when freedom is denied, but I accept and enjoy that as part of the game.
Last year though, when trying out the electronically controlled chastity device over which I had no control, the mind games were more extreme and at times I was desperate and panic-stricken.
So, in conclusion then, being submissive does not always mean giving up control, and in fact, sometimes I felt more in control than my “dominant”.
But, it seems I do not completely enjoy total submission where my freewill is restricted. Maybe I’m not so submissive after all.